


Settle Down, It'll All Be Clear

by orphan_account



Series: College Peter [3]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, College Student Peter Parker, Couch Cuddles, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, Gen, I Just felt like writing something, Iron Dad, IronDad and SpiderSon, Multi, Other, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Cuddles, Tony Stark Has A Heart, a very unoriginal idea
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-02-12
Packaged: 2019-10-26 19:48:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17752349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Peter learns that Spider-Man can't save everyone. Can he learn to live with the consequences of his alter-ego’s mistakes? Can he still be Spider-man? When Ned’s in danger, will Spider-Man be able to help him?





	Settle Down, It'll All Be Clear

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like this kind of story has probably been done a thousand times, so it's a little short, but I wanted to write it anyway. I hope you enjoy!
> 
> *Also a panic attack is mentioned but not in great detail.

In the middle of the night, Peter awoke with a gasp and sat up in bed, immediately throwing the blankets off from himself and standing up. He couldn’t breathe? Why couldn’t he breathe? Oh. Another panic attack. But why was he panicking? Had he had a bad dream? What was it about? Then it all came back to him. He had woken this same way each of the last six nights. He couldn’t stop remembering her face, even in his sleep. The fear in her eyes and then… the lifelessness that replaced the fear. Spiderman had killed her.  
Peter turned the light on in his room and walked to the adjoining bathroom to splash cool water on his face. It didn’t help, so he went to the garage, got in his car and drove around the city. Peter tried turning on the radio but nothing seemed to fit his mood, so he shut it off and tried to focus on his breathing. It felt like he’d been driving forever and the sun was just starting to come up so Peter decided to head home before the morning traffic started getting worse. He walked back into his home and made himself some coffee.

Peter jumped when he heard Tony’s voice behind him, “Hey Spider-kid, since when do you drink coffee?”  
Shoot. Peter had meant to finish his coffee and grab his things and head back out before Mr. Stark woke up. He never got up this early! “Oh uh, just uh, well ya know. I’m twenty now, thought it was time to start I guess. Junior year is pretty intense, so I just need the extra push. You uh, you want some?”  
“Sure kid, thanks.” Tony smiled, but eyed him suspiciously and Peter felt his face heat up as he poured himself and Tony each a cup.  
Peter downed his coffee as quickly as possible, his eyebrows drawing together at the strong, bitter flavor. “Well I uh, I gotta head to class.”  
“It’s only like seven-thirty Pete, and it’s Friday. You first class doesn’t start until eleven.”  
Peter narrowed his eyes at Tony. “How do you even know that?” His came out way ruder than he’s meant it to. He hadn’t gotten enough sleep and he’s been eaten alive by guilt for almost a week, but he didn’t mean to take it out on Tony.  
“You told me when the semester stared, you were excited about sleeping in one day during the week, jeez kid take it easy.”  
“Sorry, Mr. Stark.”  
Peter had been avoiding Tony all week and when they had talked the kid had been short with him and made excuses to leave. Tony wanted to be annoyed with the kid’s attitude but he looked so down and so tired and so un-Peter like. “What’s up kid?”  
“Nothing.”  
“Peter. How long have I known you? Somethings wrong. I wanna help.”  
“You can’t”  
Ahh, so there was something wrong. “Is it school? I know you’re taking some hard classes this semester. Anything you need help with?”  
Peter shook his head but didn’t speak, he wouldn’t look Tony in the eye and he seemed jittery now that the caffeine from the coffee had kicked in.  
“So is this a Peter thing or a Spider-man thing then? ‘Cause I haven’t seen you go patrolling for a few days. Did you get hurt?”  
Tony didn’t miss the way the kid went rigid when he mentioned Spider-man.  
“Mr. Stark. I can’t be him anymore. I can’t do that. I I’m done. No more patrolling, no more missions. I can’t okay.” Peter sounded annoyed again before whispering, “I’m not a hero.”  
“You’re gonna have to elaborate on that a little, Pete. Sorry. I just have no idea what you’re talking about.”  
“I, Mr. Stark I, uh when I was Spiderman, when I was uh, last week when I was out and and I was just patrolling like normal and there was a car on the road and it it didn’t, it wouldn’t stop and they were screaming that their breaks went out and and the car it went off this bridge,” Peter cleared his throat, his voice was getting thicker and thicker as he spoke, “ so I webbed it up and it was dangling there and I got everyone out but the lady in the front… she couldn’t, she she couldn’t climb out cause her seatbelt was stuck and when I was getting one of the other passengers to safety and I went back for her, she she had finally gotten her seatbelt undone and she got the kid out of the back and she slipped out and just, I tried but I couldn’t I couldn’t catch them both and and…” tears were streaming freely down Peter’s face as he confessed.  
“Peter. Hey, look at me.” Tony took Peter’s face in his hands and wiped at his tears but Peter pulled away.  
“No stop. I, I killed her Mr. Stark. I’m supposed to save people and I let that lady die. I chose someone else over her. I I can’t do that again. She fell and I was trying to get back to before she... but when she hit the water... I can’t forget her eyes. She was so scared and then she was gone.” Peter was more upset than Tony had ever seen him.

“Peter listen to me. You didn’t choose someone to live and someone to die. You tried to save them all, and in a perfect world you would have but in real life people die. You did not kill her. You saved the other passengers, if you hadn’t been there they’d all have shared her fate. Think about that, you saved three other lives, three people will live because you were able to help them. I believe you’re a hero. Peter and not just because you help people but because you truly care about them. Peter Parker is a hero, even if he wasn’t Spider-man. Your abilities are just a tool for you to help those people you care so much about. Part of that is going to be that you can’t save everyone. I know it hurts kid, and it’ll play over and over in your head until you exhaust every possible scenario of what you could have done differently to have saved the ones you didn’t. We both know you’d never choose not to save someone.”  
“Thank you, Mr. Stark but I need time. I don’t know if I can do it anymore.” Peter got up, walked out, got in his car and drove away.

A month went by and Peter still hadn’t gone out as Spider-man and he refused to talk about it anymore with Tony. He was already embarrassed he’d cried about it in front of him, he didn’t want to do it again and the guilt wouldn’t go away.  
It was a holiday from University and Peter was actually excited because Ned was home and he couldn’t wait to be with his best friend again after months apart. Peter was about to go to bed when he got a frantic call from Ned stating that his Parent’s apartment building was on fire and they couldn’t get out. Peter didn't even think twice before he threw on his suit and yelled for FRIDAY to alert Mr. Stark and have him come help.  
Spider-Man and Iron Man were able to get almost everyone out of the building without any casualties and Ned and his parents were safe and sound. Ned and his parents left to stay with another relative in the city, after Peter and Ned shared a long ‘I’m glad you’re alive’ hug. The boys parted ways with a promise of seeing each other the next day. 

Peter swung to the top of a nearby building and took off his mask. He needed a minute to breathe and to think before he went home. He laid on his back, staring at the stars until a chill seeped deep into his skin and a light misty rain left his curls drenched. 

When Peter walked through the door to his home, he saw that Tony was still awake. Obviously waiting up to make sure Peter was okay. Peter went to his room and changed into pajamas and dried his messy hair with a towel and then walked back out to the sofa and sat next to Tony. “You were right.”  
“Hmm?” Tony looked at Peter questioningly.  
“Just about my abilities being a tool to help people. I know, I know I won’t always save everyone.” Peter’s voice cracked a little and Tony tentatively put an arm around him and pulled him towards his side. Peter hadn’t sat and talked with Tony since he’d told him about the incident on the bridge, let alone let Tony hug him, so he was wary of what Peter’s reaction would be now.  
Peter went easily, leaning in wrapping his arms around Tony’s middle and laying his head on the mans chest. Tony held him close and kissed the top of his damp hair.  
Peter sighed, “Sorry. I know I’ve been a little distant but I just needed time and I guess it took Ned being in danger for me to realize that if I can save one person then it’s worth it. Those people I did save on the bridge… maybe they were someone else’s Ned, and if I can save anyone at all then I should keep trying.”  
Tony smiled and squeezed Peter tighter, “Couldn’t have said it better myself, kid.”  
Peter fell asleep on the couch that night. Safe and secure with Tony right beside him and for once he dreamt of those he did help and not the one he didn’t.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer- I don't own the characters or anything it's all Marvel's, I just like to write about them.
> 
> Sorry if any of my tags are off, I'm relatively new to this and am still learning. I hope you enjoyed the story!
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
